I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in remorse
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be experience / accept myself as remorseful towards the world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and experience myself as remorseful towards myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and experience myself as remorseful towards myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and experience and accept myself as regretful towards the world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and experience and accept myself as regretful towards myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret not being willing to assist and support myself within taking self responsibility
to write about my experience of myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into remorse instead of standing and assisting and supporting myself with self forgiveness
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to forgive myself unconditionally
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret not allowing myself to forgive myself unconditionally
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think about applying self forgiveness, instead of actually assisting and supporting
myself as Life as who I really am Here, within actually forgiving myself unconditionally, immediately
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hesitate in applying self forgiveness, and within my hesitation, go into my mind and
think about self forgiveness, and think about my experience - instead of breathing, and immediately assisting and supporting myself with and as self forgiveness
--------
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am not able to stop experiencing myself as and existing as emotions, thoughts and feelings
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear emotional experiences
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give power to emotions
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place value in emotions
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that emotions are 'who I really am' - instead of realizing that who I really am
is constant, stable, eternal - Here - and that emotions are merely an energetic experience that functions and exists as a system - as a systematic experience with a beginning and end --- emotions are not who I really am - it is not me actually experiencing a real experience of myself - it is a system - it is energy - I am not energy - energy is not 'who I really am' -- who I really am is here as breath - who I really am is silence - who I really am is - nothingness - who I really am is stillness - no movement of emotion, feeling, thought, reaction, energy
Who I really am is silence, stillness, stability, constancy, consistency - as breath, here in every moment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the lie that I must be, become, experience and accept myself as the mind consciousness system as emotions, thoughts, feelings, reactions as energy
----
Dread
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and experience myself as dread
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dread my emotions
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dread the patterns as energy that I experience
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as the emotions, feelings, thoughts, reactions as energy that arises within me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if and when an emotion as energy comes up within me - that means I must accept myself as that emotion, and that I am defined by and as that emotion - that the emotion is 'who I really am' - instead of realizing and seeing that the emotion is an energetic experience created through programming as information that I have accepted as 'who I am' and 'how I am'
Till Here No Further.
I do not accept or allow myself to define myself as emotions, feelings, thoughts, reactions, energy.
I am not energy.
I am not emotions.
I am not feelings.
I am not reactions.
I am not thoughts.
I am nothingness - I am silence - I am stillness - I am darkness - I am a breath.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Monday, June 28, 2010
Jun. 28 - Self Forgiveness on missing an appointment
This is with regards to a follow up appointment that I had made with someone.
I discussed with andrea that we will meet again in 2 weeks from that day - a tuesday. I wrote the appointment down in my appointment book. When I left the building, I felt relieved - I was glad I had 'extra time'. Somehow I placed the date of the appointment in my mind as being in July instead of June.
I do not remember this moment.
As the days passed from that day, I did my thing each day and in my mind my next appointment with andrea was 'in July'. This was accompanied by an experience that 'I am safe as long as it is still June', I don't have to worry about the appointment until July.
Then yesterday, June 27, I checked my appointment book and saw that I had actually written down our next appointment as being on June 22 - which means I missed the actual appointment.
When I saw this I reacted with anxiety, dread, fear, regret, disappointment, shame. I immediately saw that I had been trusting what I saw in my mind this whole time, I had trusted my placement of the appointment as being in July -- even though this was not written down anywhere and was simply me believing that the next appointment is in July.
So, what did I do? After my appointment with andrea, I didn't want to 'worry' or 'concern' myself with our next appointment because in my mind I now had 'all this time' until our next appointment. In my mind I placed our next appointment as being in July - and thus I didn't have to concern myself with the appointment as long as it was still June.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my responsibility for keeping track of my appointment, to my mind, because in my mind I was able to make the appointment seem like it was further away - and within this I was able to feel more relaxed and as long as I held that point in my mind I did not have to keep track of it in actuality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect taking responsibility for my appointment, because I didn't feel like giving it attention, because I didn't want to feel stressed out.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the appointment itself was the cause of my stress - instead of realizing that the cause of my stress is me - and that I have defined the appointment as 'stressful' -- why? Because I have defined 'making appointments' as something 'business' related, and 'who I am' is not good at 'business' related things. I have defined myself and placed myself as 'less than' business related things.
I have defined and placed myself as 'inferior' to business related things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'not good at business related things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place myself and define myself as 'inferior' to business related things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define business related things as 'stressful'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that whenever I get involved with something 'business' related - that I will experience stress, and that I should experience stress.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a 'creative' person - as defined by someone who is not good at 'business' things, but is rather good at 'art things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define creativity as 'making art'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'creativity' as meaning 'not good at doing non-art things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define business related activities / things as 'hard'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the word 'hard' as meaning 'something that causes and creates stress in me.'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'not want to do or be involved in business related activities and things' -- within having defined myself as being a 'creative' person as define by someone who only does 'art things' and does not do 'business related things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have an idea about myself that I am 'not good at' business related activities and things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the word business.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being and becoming involved in business related activities and things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear speaking to people in a 'business related' situation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place the expectation on myself that in 'business related' situations, I will be
and experience myself as 'stressed'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind to escape the business related situation I found myself in - because I did not want to face and confront and take responsibility for the situation because I was stressed.
So I used my mind as a way to escape from the stress I experienced, and the way I escaped from the stress, was to in my mind believe that I had 'more time' in which to not have to deal with / participate in the business related situation. the more time I have, the less stressed I am. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define participating in / being involved in business related situations and activities is 'stressful' - instead of realizing that it is not the situation itself that is stressful, nor is the the thing that situation is related to - I myself am the cause and creator of my stress through ideas, definitions, beliefs, judgments, opinions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the opinion that business and business related situations and activities are 'stressful'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide from my experience of myself by using my mind to escape into an alternate, projected reality that is the reality I would 'prefer' to experience. I used my mind to place myself into a time frame that made me feel less stressed.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind to escape from my experience of stress in relation to my appointment, by creating an alternate time frame in my mind in which I have 'more time' before my appointment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in what I see and experience through and within my mind as thoughts and projected situations, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust my mind, through having accepted and allowed myself to believe in my mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that thoughts and projections in my mind are actually in fact indicating and representing a real situation and that thus my thoughts and projections in my mind can be trusted.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want, need and desire a way to cope with my experience of myself. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in using my mind as a way to cope with my experience of myself, by creating thoughts, projections, fantasies, pictures that reflect / are based in what I would prefer to experience, and how I would prefer my situation to exist.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust my mind instead of trusting me here in and as breath.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take responsibility for what I am responsible for.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use thoughts and projections and fantasies to feel okay about my situation, instead of
facing any experience of myself as being 'not okay', and taking self responsibility for my experience by identifying how I have created my experience, and
applying self forgiveness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to 'coping' with my experience, within allowing myself to believe that any 'quick fix' experience I am able to have is actually the solution to my experience - instead of realizing that in covering up my experience / suppressing my experience with a 'better' experience - I am actually not solving my experience / not making my experience 'go away'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try and make my experience 'go away' through covering up my experience / suppressing my experience using an energetic veil to create the illusion that I am having a 'different' experience.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize and see that whatever experience I am having - is the truth of me, is showing me the truth of what I accept and allow in myself, as myself - and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I can 'change' my experience by covering it up with another experience as an energetic veil, instead of realizing that I am only ever hiding from the truth of me, within an energetic veil as illusion within which I am avoiding taking responsibility for what I accept and allow.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for hiding from my experience and not taking responsibility.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret not taking responsibility.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see the gift in this - which is that now I see how to be more effective, and see how I was making my experience more difficult through having participated in my mind. Now I see that I have been allowing myself to trust my mind - to trust my thoughts and the projected situations I see in my mind, in separation from reality, from what is actually happening Here.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when I am experiencing anxiety about the future - I am creating that experience through participating in my mind. I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize and see that the reason I experience anxiety in relation to a future situation, is because I have placed myself as less than that situation - I am fearing that situation. I see I am experiencing anxiety / fear in relation to my appointment with andrea - and I see that this is because I am still placing myself as less than the situation, I am fearing that I will stumble over my words or do something incorrectly.
In this case, the thing I am fearing is the moment when it is time to go over the contract / payment options -- in my mind I am seeing myself as not knowing exactly what to say and do -- I am fearing that it will be awkward and that I will not be able to explain everything clearly.
What is the solution? Learn the material. Familiarize myself with what I am required to understand, so that it is no longer unfamiliar.
There is no other solution.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, instead of simply learning what I am required to understand - go into my mind and place myself in an imaginary situation in the future in which I did not learn what was required to be learned.
Why would I do this? that is completely unnecessary and does not accomplish anything. This also shows that I am believing that I will 'not be able to' or am not 'capable' of learning what is required to be learned and understood.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am 'not capable' of learning and understanding what is required to be learned and understood. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to then worry about / imagine situations in which I will be required to understand what it is I believe I am not capable of understanding.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the mind as beliefs instead of participating Here, physically, directing myself in every breath within taking responsibility for what I see is required to be don - and not accepting or allowing myself to compromise my physical participation and directiveness through going into my mind and participating in projected alternate realities.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to be here as breath in every moment - and to within being here as breath, simply do what is required to be done, do what is relevant to be done Here in the physical - instead of going into my mind and creating / participating in imaginary situations and scenarios.
I discussed with andrea that we will meet again in 2 weeks from that day - a tuesday. I wrote the appointment down in my appointment book. When I left the building, I felt relieved - I was glad I had 'extra time'. Somehow I placed the date of the appointment in my mind as being in July instead of June.
I do not remember this moment.
As the days passed from that day, I did my thing each day and in my mind my next appointment with andrea was 'in July'. This was accompanied by an experience that 'I am safe as long as it is still June', I don't have to worry about the appointment until July.
Then yesterday, June 27, I checked my appointment book and saw that I had actually written down our next appointment as being on June 22 - which means I missed the actual appointment.
When I saw this I reacted with anxiety, dread, fear, regret, disappointment, shame. I immediately saw that I had been trusting what I saw in my mind this whole time, I had trusted my placement of the appointment as being in July -- even though this was not written down anywhere and was simply me believing that the next appointment is in July.
So, what did I do? After my appointment with andrea, I didn't want to 'worry' or 'concern' myself with our next appointment because in my mind I now had 'all this time' until our next appointment. In my mind I placed our next appointment as being in July - and thus I didn't have to concern myself with the appointment as long as it was still June.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my responsibility for keeping track of my appointment, to my mind, because in my mind I was able to make the appointment seem like it was further away - and within this I was able to feel more relaxed and as long as I held that point in my mind I did not have to keep track of it in actuality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect taking responsibility for my appointment, because I didn't feel like giving it attention, because I didn't want to feel stressed out.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the appointment itself was the cause of my stress - instead of realizing that the cause of my stress is me - and that I have defined the appointment as 'stressful' -- why? Because I have defined 'making appointments' as something 'business' related, and 'who I am' is not good at 'business' related things. I have defined myself and placed myself as 'less than' business related things.
I have defined and placed myself as 'inferior' to business related things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'not good at business related things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place myself and define myself as 'inferior' to business related things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define business related things as 'stressful'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that whenever I get involved with something 'business' related - that I will experience stress, and that I should experience stress.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a 'creative' person - as defined by someone who is not good at 'business' things, but is rather good at 'art things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define creativity as 'making art'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'creativity' as meaning 'not good at doing non-art things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define business related activities / things as 'hard'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the word 'hard' as meaning 'something that causes and creates stress in me.'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'not want to do or be involved in business related activities and things' -- within having defined myself as being a 'creative' person as define by someone who only does 'art things' and does not do 'business related things'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have an idea about myself that I am 'not good at' business related activities and things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the word business.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being and becoming involved in business related activities and things.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear speaking to people in a 'business related' situation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place the expectation on myself that in 'business related' situations, I will be
and experience myself as 'stressed'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind to escape the business related situation I found myself in - because I did not want to face and confront and take responsibility for the situation because I was stressed.
So I used my mind as a way to escape from the stress I experienced, and the way I escaped from the stress, was to in my mind believe that I had 'more time' in which to not have to deal with / participate in the business related situation. the more time I have, the less stressed I am. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define participating in / being involved in business related situations and activities is 'stressful' - instead of realizing that it is not the situation itself that is stressful, nor is the the thing that situation is related to - I myself am the cause and creator of my stress through ideas, definitions, beliefs, judgments, opinions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the opinion that business and business related situations and activities are 'stressful'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide from my experience of myself by using my mind to escape into an alternate, projected reality that is the reality I would 'prefer' to experience. I used my mind to place myself into a time frame that made me feel less stressed.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind to escape from my experience of stress in relation to my appointment, by creating an alternate time frame in my mind in which I have 'more time' before my appointment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in what I see and experience through and within my mind as thoughts and projected situations, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust my mind, through having accepted and allowed myself to believe in my mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that thoughts and projections in my mind are actually in fact indicating and representing a real situation and that thus my thoughts and projections in my mind can be trusted.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want, need and desire a way to cope with my experience of myself. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in using my mind as a way to cope with my experience of myself, by creating thoughts, projections, fantasies, pictures that reflect / are based in what I would prefer to experience, and how I would prefer my situation to exist.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust my mind instead of trusting me here in and as breath.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take responsibility for what I am responsible for.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use thoughts and projections and fantasies to feel okay about my situation, instead of
facing any experience of myself as being 'not okay', and taking self responsibility for my experience by identifying how I have created my experience, and
applying self forgiveness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to 'coping' with my experience, within allowing myself to believe that any 'quick fix' experience I am able to have is actually the solution to my experience - instead of realizing that in covering up my experience / suppressing my experience with a 'better' experience - I am actually not solving my experience / not making my experience 'go away'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try and make my experience 'go away' through covering up my experience / suppressing my experience using an energetic veil to create the illusion that I am having a 'different' experience.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize and see that whatever experience I am having - is the truth of me, is showing me the truth of what I accept and allow in myself, as myself - and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I can 'change' my experience by covering it up with another experience as an energetic veil, instead of realizing that I am only ever hiding from the truth of me, within an energetic veil as illusion within which I am avoiding taking responsibility for what I accept and allow.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for hiding from my experience and not taking responsibility.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret not taking responsibility.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see the gift in this - which is that now I see how to be more effective, and see how I was making my experience more difficult through having participated in my mind. Now I see that I have been allowing myself to trust my mind - to trust my thoughts and the projected situations I see in my mind, in separation from reality, from what is actually happening Here.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when I am experiencing anxiety about the future - I am creating that experience through participating in my mind. I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize and see that the reason I experience anxiety in relation to a future situation, is because I have placed myself as less than that situation - I am fearing that situation. I see I am experiencing anxiety / fear in relation to my appointment with andrea - and I see that this is because I am still placing myself as less than the situation, I am fearing that I will stumble over my words or do something incorrectly.
In this case, the thing I am fearing is the moment when it is time to go over the contract / payment options -- in my mind I am seeing myself as not knowing exactly what to say and do -- I am fearing that it will be awkward and that I will not be able to explain everything clearly.
What is the solution? Learn the material. Familiarize myself with what I am required to understand, so that it is no longer unfamiliar.
There is no other solution.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, instead of simply learning what I am required to understand - go into my mind and place myself in an imaginary situation in the future in which I did not learn what was required to be learned.
Why would I do this? that is completely unnecessary and does not accomplish anything. This also shows that I am believing that I will 'not be able to' or am not 'capable' of learning what is required to be learned and understood.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am 'not capable' of learning and understanding what is required to be learned and understood. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to then worry about / imagine situations in which I will be required to understand what it is I believe I am not capable of understanding.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the mind as beliefs instead of participating Here, physically, directing myself in every breath within taking responsibility for what I see is required to be don - and not accepting or allowing myself to compromise my physical participation and directiveness through going into my mind and participating in projected alternate realities.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to be here as breath in every moment - and to within being here as breath, simply do what is required to be done, do what is relevant to be done Here in the physical - instead of going into my mind and creating / participating in imaginary situations and scenarios.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Sun. June 27 - experiences and self forgiveness
Experiences / emotions / feelings that have come up today
sluggishness - towards working / participating / writing
tiredness - towards working / participating / writing
resistance towards working / participating / interacting / communicating
judgment - towards working / participating / communication / videos that people have made that I saw on youtube
fear - towards writing / working
anxiety - towards writing / working
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in tiredness / sluggishness in relation to / towards work and my daily participation
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in / believe in my experience of sluggishness / tiredness in relation to work / my daily participation -- and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify participating in / believing in sluggishness / tiredness -- using the excuse / judgment that my work and daily participation is 'boring' --- this 'boringness' is a judgment within which I have defined my work / daily participation according to what I have experienced in the past in my life as 'what I like / enjoy doing' and 'what I dislike / don't enjoy doing'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my work / daily participation according to what I have experienced in the past as 'what I like / enjoy doing' and 'what I dislike / don't enjoy doing'. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define / judge my work / participation as 'boring'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'something that I experience as boring' as 'something that makes me tired / makes me experience tiredness'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and accept that if I do something that I experience as 'boring' that I will get tired.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'attention' as something that is difficult to maintain
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'attention' in separation of myself as 'something that is able to waiver / become less / be lost' instead of realizing and seeing that attention is Here as me as the breath of life in every moment -- it is not something that can be 'lost' or that can 'waiver'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use 'getting tired' as an excuse to 'not participate for a moment' -- within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept myself as being less than the work that is required to be done
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place / see my daily work and participation as something that is 'more than me'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define certain musical styles as 'stupid'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define certain musical styles as 'dumb'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define certain musical styles as 'boring'
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I do not have to have a judgment / definition of a musical style
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see others through the eyes of personality, and to within this compare myself as a personality to others personalities and within that participate in judging / defining / labeling / assigning value to others' personalities based on what makes me feel the most superior / valuable / cool / interesting / intelligent
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I wake up in the morning, believe that any emotion / feeling / though experience that arises is 'what I must experience' and 'how I must experience myself' and to believe that any feeling / emotional / thought experience is absolute and without question indicating 'who and what I must accept myself as and experience myself as' --- instead of realizing that myself as the physical, in every breath is NOT a feeling / emotion / though experience and thus any feeling / emotion / thought experience that arises in the morning when I wake up -- is not who I really am - but is merely an energetic experience that is running as a pattern that I have accepted myself to exist / experience myself within and as and through
Therefore, I breathe - I do not participate in believing that feeling / emotion / though experiences are 'who I really am' and that 'I must participate in these experiences'
I rather recognize that I have the ability to take responsibility to direct / stop these experiences because I created them as they exist in and as me, and thus I trust myself within walking this process of inevitably stopping / ending all such energetic experiences.
sluggishness - towards working / participating / writing
tiredness - towards working / participating / writing
resistance towards working / participating / interacting / communicating
judgment - towards working / participating / communication / videos that people have made that I saw on youtube
fear - towards writing / working
anxiety - towards writing / working
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in tiredness / sluggishness in relation to / towards work and my daily participation
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in / believe in my experience of sluggishness / tiredness in relation to work / my daily participation -- and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify participating in / believing in sluggishness / tiredness -- using the excuse / judgment that my work and daily participation is 'boring' --- this 'boringness' is a judgment within which I have defined my work / daily participation according to what I have experienced in the past in my life as 'what I like / enjoy doing' and 'what I dislike / don't enjoy doing'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my work / daily participation according to what I have experienced in the past as 'what I like / enjoy doing' and 'what I dislike / don't enjoy doing'. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define / judge my work / participation as 'boring'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'something that I experience as boring' as 'something that makes me tired / makes me experience tiredness'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and accept that if I do something that I experience as 'boring' that I will get tired.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'attention' as something that is difficult to maintain
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'attention' in separation of myself as 'something that is able to waiver / become less / be lost' instead of realizing and seeing that attention is Here as me as the breath of life in every moment -- it is not something that can be 'lost' or that can 'waiver'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use 'getting tired' as an excuse to 'not participate for a moment' -- within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept myself as being less than the work that is required to be done
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place / see my daily work and participation as something that is 'more than me'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define certain musical styles as 'stupid'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define certain musical styles as 'dumb'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define certain musical styles as 'boring'
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I do not have to have a judgment / definition of a musical style
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see others through the eyes of personality, and to within this compare myself as a personality to others personalities and within that participate in judging / defining / labeling / assigning value to others' personalities based on what makes me feel the most superior / valuable / cool / interesting / intelligent
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I wake up in the morning, believe that any emotion / feeling / though experience that arises is 'what I must experience' and 'how I must experience myself' and to believe that any feeling / emotional / thought experience is absolute and without question indicating 'who and what I must accept myself as and experience myself as' --- instead of realizing that myself as the physical, in every breath is NOT a feeling / emotion / though experience and thus any feeling / emotion / thought experience that arises in the morning when I wake up -- is not who I really am - but is merely an energetic experience that is running as a pattern that I have accepted myself to exist / experience myself within and as and through
Therefore, I breathe - I do not participate in believing that feeling / emotion / though experiences are 'who I really am' and that 'I must participate in these experiences'
I rather recognize that I have the ability to take responsibility to direct / stop these experiences because I created them as they exist in and as me, and thus I trust myself within walking this process of inevitably stopping / ending all such energetic experiences.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
I am the Point of my Existence - Process Support Vlog
giving perspective on wanting and needing attention from others as energy to maintain
the perception of stability within personality - where self has made energy / getting attention the 'point' of ones existence, instead of realizing Self is the only point of Self's existence
I am the Point of my Existence - Process Support Vlog
the perception of stability within personality - where self has made energy / getting attention the 'point' of ones existence, instead of realizing Self is the only point of Self's existence
I am the Point of my Existence - Process Support Vlog
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Changing Core Beliefs - Video Response to Bashar
Interesting point about how channelers and the beings they channel both accept and allow inequality - despite talking about 'oneness' - which reveals that neither channel nor channeled being understand oneness and are only spreading deception
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IU0Hwg4xmYc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IU0Hwg4xmYc
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Self Forgiveness Jan. 27 2009 - money anxiety
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience anxiety towards money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define money as the solution to anxiety about money - instead of realizing that my anxiety about money exists within me because I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough money, therefore the anxiety I experience when I think about not having enough money, motivates me to try and get money so that I do not have to experience anxiety anymore -- but in this, money is not the solution - because I am existing within the polarity of having enough / not enough money - indicating that I fear to lose money - because I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the polarity manifestations of this world of rich and poor -- with rich defined as 'free' and poor defined as 'not free' -- therefore within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define freedom as having money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that as long as I have money saved and hoarded away - I will be safe and free, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define safety as 'having money saved and hoarded away'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money has power and value in and of itself - instead of realizing that the power and value that money has, is what I accept and allow myself to assign to money - making money in and of itself a sign of value and power - in this, creating the desire in me to have money, so that I can have that which is valuable and powerful - so that I can be valuable and powerful
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define enslavement as 'not having money'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in relationship towards rich and poor - in separation of those who experience wealth and poverty, and to see poverty as something that I would not want to experience and therefore I must have money so that I do not have to exist like those who are poor
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the idea that 'having money equals having freedom'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the idea that 'not having money equals not having freedom'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed by fear of not having enough money - instead of stopping within and as my experience of fear and not accepting or allowing myself to be influenced by what I am feeling - but instead, direct myself in self honesty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear existing in poverty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of rich and poor - instead of seeing that rich and poor are just ideas - points of a polarity used to justify the existence of both wealth and poverty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define money as the solution to anxiety about money - instead of realizing that my anxiety about money exists within me because I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough money, therefore the anxiety I experience when I think about not having enough money, motivates me to try and get money so that I do not have to experience anxiety anymore -- but in this, money is not the solution - because I am existing within the polarity of having enough / not enough money - indicating that I fear to lose money - because I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the polarity manifestations of this world of rich and poor -- with rich defined as 'free' and poor defined as 'not free' -- therefore within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define freedom as having money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that as long as I have money saved and hoarded away - I will be safe and free, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define safety as 'having money saved and hoarded away'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money has power and value in and of itself - instead of realizing that the power and value that money has, is what I accept and allow myself to assign to money - making money in and of itself a sign of value and power - in this, creating the desire in me to have money, so that I can have that which is valuable and powerful - so that I can be valuable and powerful
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define enslavement as 'not having money'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in relationship towards rich and poor - in separation of those who experience wealth and poverty, and to see poverty as something that I would not want to experience and therefore I must have money so that I do not have to exist like those who are poor
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the idea that 'having money equals having freedom'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the idea that 'not having money equals not having freedom'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed by fear of not having enough money - instead of stopping within and as my experience of fear and not accepting or allowing myself to be influenced by what I am feeling - but instead, direct myself in self honesty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear existing in poverty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of rich and poor - instead of seeing that rich and poor are just ideas - points of a polarity used to justify the existence of both wealth and poverty
self Forgiveness Jan. 27 2009 - fear of not having money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will not save enough money in time for my departure to south africa
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define security as having money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that self expression is something only possible with money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I need to fear not having money in order to motivate myself to make money - instead of realizing that this is me defining money in separation from me, with me in relationship towards money
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that making money is simply a matter of me directing me - and does not require me to fear lack of money in order to for me to make money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to and as the idea of survival
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to and within the idea and belief that having more money means I have more time - and therefore to have more money is to have more time in which to live and express myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define living as that which can only be done in the amount of time which must be earned through making money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough time to express myself - instead of realizing that self expression is not defined by an idea of time - it does not exist in time - self expression is here as me in every moment of breath
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that life exists in moments of time which are earned through making money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the idea of time
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough time
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that living does not exist in time - living is me here in every moment of breath, directing and expressing me in self honesty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse of 'there isn't enough time' as a justification to not direct myself in every moment - accepting and allowing myself to be directed and controlled by my idea of there 'not being enough time'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry at the money system, instead of realizing that the money system exists within and as me, as a manifestation of what I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as - therefore to be angry at the money system is to be angry at me, and projecting anger is not an acceptable or effective way of directing what is here as myself because it implies that I see the money system as separate from me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the idea that 'personal freedom' can be bought by earning money and purchasing amounts of time in which to be 'free to live my life'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that personal freedom exists - as defined by an experience of being 'free to live and express myself' without having to consider anything but my personal experience - which is attained through money - instead of realizing that such 'personal freedom' is not real, because such an experience only exists if I see money as separate from me, if I see the world as separate from me, if I see others as separate from me - because then I am 'free' to exist in self interest, considering only my experience - and that the pursuit of 'personal freedom' is actually me confirming to me that I am enslaved to systems which I have not stood one and equal with
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to money, seeing money as a powerful force which controls me, instead of realizing that money is a manifestation of me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will not save enough money in time for my departure to south africa
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define security as having money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that self expression is something only possible with money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I need to fear not having money in order to motivate myself to make money - instead of realizing that this is me defining money in separation from me, with me in relationship towards money
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that making money is simply a matter of me directing me - and does not require me to fear lack of money in order to for me to make money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to and as the idea of survival
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to and within the idea and belief that having more money means I have more time - and therefore to have more money is to have more time in which to live and express myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define living as that which can only be done in the amount of time which must be earned through making money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough time to express myself - instead of realizing that self expression is not defined by an idea of time - it does not exist in time - self expression is here as me in every moment of breath
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that life exists in moments of time which are earned through making money
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the idea of time
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough time
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that living does not exist in time - living is me here in every moment of breath, directing and expressing me in self honesty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse of 'there isn't enough time' as a justification to not direct myself in every moment - accepting and allowing myself to be directed and controlled by my idea of there 'not being enough time'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry at the money system, instead of realizing that the money system exists within and as me, as a manifestation of what I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as - therefore to be angry at the money system is to be angry at me, and projecting anger is not an acceptable or effective way of directing what is here as myself because it implies that I see the money system as separate from me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the idea that 'personal freedom' can be bought by earning money and purchasing amounts of time in which to be 'free to live my life'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that personal freedom exists - as defined by an experience of being 'free to live and express myself' without having to consider anything but my personal experience - which is attained through money - instead of realizing that such 'personal freedom' is not real, because such an experience only exists if I see money as separate from me, if I see the world as separate from me, if I see others as separate from me - because then I am 'free' to exist in self interest, considering only my experience - and that the pursuit of 'personal freedom' is actually me confirming to me that I am enslaved to systems which I have not stood one and equal with
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to money, seeing money as a powerful force which controls me, instead of realizing that money is a manifestation of me
Self Forgiveness Jan. 3 2009 - body, health, shame, judgment, separation, spirituality
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate with my body from the starting point of rebelling against 'healthy living' - to apparently prove to myself that I am not allowing myself to be controlled by the media or others regarding health - when in fact within such a starting point I am separating myself from my body, trying to prove to myself that I do not need to 'care' or be concerned about my body, so that I can confirm to myself in my mind that I am not one of 'those people' who live in fear of being unhealthy - and within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to stand one and equal with my body and support my body as me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that my body is me - therefore in rebelling against 'being healthy' I am actually seeing my body as separate from me, and deliberately neglecting my body to prove to myself in my mind that I am not afraid of being unhealthy - within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my physical human body according to and as the polarity of healthy/unhealthy
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that such a state of 'unhealth' exists - when in reality it is just my body, and the state of my body which is existing according to what I am accepting and allowing - and the same goes for the state of 'health'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity belief that I am either healthy or unhealthy
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to listen to what my body is telling me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to honor my body as one and equal with me, as me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that it is not about deliberately doing whatever I want to my body to prove that I do not subscribe to the health polarity, -it is about standing one and equal with my body here as myself - and not accepting or allowing myself to create fears, rules, polarities within and as myself towards my body according to outside influences - but within this, using common sense and being self honest about what supports my body and what does not support
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally stand one and equal with my body as myself and support my body, listen to my body, honor my body
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect my body in small ways - doing this to prove to myself in my thoughts that I no longer subscribe to what I once did as being a lightworker, eating foods that I perceived would put me in a higher vibration
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed and embarrassed with myself for having accepted and allowed myself to participate in being a lightworker
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have taken out my shame of being a lightworker on others who see themselves as lightworkers - trying to get them to see how stupid they are being instead of just sharing, directing and supporting as I see necessary in self honesty - me expressing me - not me abusing others through my ego - realizing that they are myself, and do not deserve to be abused for the sake of me covering up my shame
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed with myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in thoughts, instead of realizing that beyond showing me what I am accepting and allowing, my thoughts are useless and in following them I always lead myself into dishonesty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as memories in my mind of myself as a lightworker - and to judge these memories of me - instead of realizing that I am not a memory, and it is unnecessary to hold such memories within my mind - and since I am not a memory, in judging my memories, I am judging myself - I can only ever judge myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that whenever I am judging something I have done in the past - that means I am judging me here and now - because my judgment exists here towards myself actually
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify my judgments within the excuse and belief that if it happened in the past, then I am not judging me or another, I am just 'looking back in time' and judging something that I believe deserves judgment - instead of realizing the stupidity in this - because when I am judging - it does not matter whether I perceive that which I judge to exist in the past, present or future - it is all here and is all me judging me always
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within and as judgment - in seeing that when I am participating in judgment - I am existing as judgment toward myself in separation of me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the perception of time, within and as relationship towards my past - instead of realizing that all that I am is always here - therefore in looking back at my past, I am actually looking at what is here as myself - so to define my past as memories, as pictures, is to separate myself from my past, seeing my past as events that exist as pictures that have happened 'back there in time' instead of realizing that the picture is just a picture in my mind, and that the event itself exists here within and as myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to be gentle with my body - in realizing that my body is me, so in being gentle with my body I am being gentle with me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the idea of myself as an outsider, a rebel
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that in seeing myself as an outsider, I am accepting that there is something separate from me which is there to fight, to resist - when in reality, what resists, persists - thus in embracing all points as myself, I become all points and direct myself as those points
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to determine my actions based on what others do and say - so that I don't have to be self honest with me in every moment, so that I don't have to trust me and direct me in every moment here as the breath
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as comparison
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of resist/submit
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define standing up as resisting
I am here, I direct me in self honesty as the breath in every moment - that's it
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that my body is me - therefore in rebelling against 'being healthy' I am actually seeing my body as separate from me, and deliberately neglecting my body to prove to myself in my mind that I am not afraid of being unhealthy - within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my physical human body according to and as the polarity of healthy/unhealthy
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that such a state of 'unhealth' exists - when in reality it is just my body, and the state of my body which is existing according to what I am accepting and allowing - and the same goes for the state of 'health'
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity belief that I am either healthy or unhealthy
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to listen to what my body is telling me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to honor my body as one and equal with me, as me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that it is not about deliberately doing whatever I want to my body to prove that I do not subscribe to the health polarity, -it is about standing one and equal with my body here as myself - and not accepting or allowing myself to create fears, rules, polarities within and as myself towards my body according to outside influences - but within this, using common sense and being self honest about what supports my body and what does not support
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally stand one and equal with my body as myself and support my body, listen to my body, honor my body
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect my body in small ways - doing this to prove to myself in my thoughts that I no longer subscribe to what I once did as being a lightworker, eating foods that I perceived would put me in a higher vibration
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed and embarrassed with myself for having accepted and allowed myself to participate in being a lightworker
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have taken out my shame of being a lightworker on others who see themselves as lightworkers - trying to get them to see how stupid they are being instead of just sharing, directing and supporting as I see necessary in self honesty - me expressing me - not me abusing others through my ego - realizing that they are myself, and do not deserve to be abused for the sake of me covering up my shame
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed with myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in thoughts, instead of realizing that beyond showing me what I am accepting and allowing, my thoughts are useless and in following them I always lead myself into dishonesty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as memories in my mind of myself as a lightworker - and to judge these memories of me - instead of realizing that I am not a memory, and it is unnecessary to hold such memories within my mind - and since I am not a memory, in judging my memories, I am judging myself - I can only ever judge myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that whenever I am judging something I have done in the past - that means I am judging me here and now - because my judgment exists here towards myself actually
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify my judgments within the excuse and belief that if it happened in the past, then I am not judging me or another, I am just 'looking back in time' and judging something that I believe deserves judgment - instead of realizing the stupidity in this - because when I am judging - it does not matter whether I perceive that which I judge to exist in the past, present or future - it is all here and is all me judging me always
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within and as judgment - in seeing that when I am participating in judgment - I am existing as judgment toward myself in separation of me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the perception of time, within and as relationship towards my past - instead of realizing that all that I am is always here - therefore in looking back at my past, I am actually looking at what is here as myself - so to define my past as memories, as pictures, is to separate myself from my past, seeing my past as events that exist as pictures that have happened 'back there in time' instead of realizing that the picture is just a picture in my mind, and that the event itself exists here within and as myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to be gentle with my body - in realizing that my body is me, so in being gentle with my body I am being gentle with me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the idea of myself as an outsider, a rebel
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that in seeing myself as an outsider, I am accepting that there is something separate from me which is there to fight, to resist - when in reality, what resists, persists - thus in embracing all points as myself, I become all points and direct myself as those points
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to determine my actions based on what others do and say - so that I don't have to be self honest with me in every moment, so that I don't have to trust me and direct me in every moment here as the breath
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as comparison
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of resist/submit
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define standing up as resisting
I am here, I direct me in self honesty as the breath in every moment - that's it
Self Forgiveness Jan. 10 2009 - being nice, fear of violence, confrontation, awkwardness, peace
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give value to my idea of niceness
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my idea of niceness to avoid awkwardness and confrontation
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I can only fear awkwardness and confrontation if I exist as personality, as an idea and definition of myself - and that who I really am here as the breath in unconditional self honest expression is not able to be awkward - therefore it is stupid to use personality as a means to avoid awkwardness, as awkwardness only exists through personality
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear confrontation
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define stability according to my idea of niceness, wherein if I am nice to people then I will not experience conflict, and I will then be stable - instead of realizing that this is not real stability, it is an idea of stability which actually exists within and as the polarity of safe/unsafe - with unsafe defined as vulnerable - able to be harmed or abused, and safe defined as actions taken to preserve and maintain my personality of niceness, to avoid vulnerability and conflict and hurt
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define vulnerability as being able to be hurt and abused
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of safe/unsafe
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the words of others
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear physical violence being done unto me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see and realize that since all others are actually me, myself - that I am not actually able to really be hurt or harmed - and such a fear of physical violence and hurt being done unto me exists as the fear of losing myself, the fear of not existing
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that all fear of physical violence and harm being done unto me is actually the fear of me not existing - but since I am all that exists, that is impossible
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am required to serve others' personalities by ensuring that their feelings don't get hurt - otherwise I will not be able to exist in this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not existing in this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself to express me unconditionally in self honesty no matter who I am with, because I fear to lose the illusion of stability that I experience when I am nice to people and am able to avoid conflict
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that conflict can only exist if both beings participating are self dishonest - thus if I am self honest, and unconditionally here - I experience no conflict - and if someone directs words or actions towards me that is abusive or violent, it is a result of what they are accepting and allowing within them and exists as inner conflict within themselves - just as my conflicts exist within myself as what I accept and allow
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the polarity of peace/conflict, by holding onto my ideas and definitions and fears of conflict
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of peace/conflict
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my idea of niceness to avoid awkwardness and confrontation
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I can only fear awkwardness and confrontation if I exist as personality, as an idea and definition of myself - and that who I really am here as the breath in unconditional self honest expression is not able to be awkward - therefore it is stupid to use personality as a means to avoid awkwardness, as awkwardness only exists through personality
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear confrontation
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define stability according to my idea of niceness, wherein if I am nice to people then I will not experience conflict, and I will then be stable - instead of realizing that this is not real stability, it is an idea of stability which actually exists within and as the polarity of safe/unsafe - with unsafe defined as vulnerable - able to be harmed or abused, and safe defined as actions taken to preserve and maintain my personality of niceness, to avoid vulnerability and conflict and hurt
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define vulnerability as being able to be hurt and abused
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of safe/unsafe
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the words of others
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear physical violence being done unto me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see and realize that since all others are actually me, myself - that I am not actually able to really be hurt or harmed - and such a fear of physical violence and hurt being done unto me exists as the fear of losing myself, the fear of not existing
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that all fear of physical violence and harm being done unto me is actually the fear of me not existing - but since I am all that exists, that is impossible
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am required to serve others' personalities by ensuring that their feelings don't get hurt - otherwise I will not be able to exist in this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not existing in this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself to express me unconditionally in self honesty no matter who I am with, because I fear to lose the illusion of stability that I experience when I am nice to people and am able to avoid conflict
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that conflict can only exist if both beings participating are self dishonest - thus if I am self honest, and unconditionally here - I experience no conflict - and if someone directs words or actions towards me that is abusive or violent, it is a result of what they are accepting and allowing within them and exists as inner conflict within themselves - just as my conflicts exist within myself as what I accept and allow
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the polarity of peace/conflict, by holding onto my ideas and definitions and fears of conflict
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of peace/conflict
Self Forgiveness Nov. 9 2008 - beauty, art, ugliness, love, judgment
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to others based on the idea of value a being has according to the standards of beauty presented by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the standards of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as having less value than people who embody the standards of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people as ugly or beautiful based on the standards of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of ugly and beautiful
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people who embody my idea of attractive as having more value than those who do do not
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people who embody my idea of ugly as having less value than those who do not
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be programmed to define quality of life as having money and being attractive according to the standards of beauty and success presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money equals value
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define life according to money and beauty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to embody the standard of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to embody and attain to the standards of success presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money = success = life
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the my idea of beauty is real
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see and realize the separation implied within the idea that beauty and success = value = life - wherein, if one has money one has value
if one has beauty one has value
if one has neither beauty nor money, then one is inherently valueless according to the system's standards and definitions of value
and therefore one without beauty or money is seen as worthless, and therefore bases their entire existence around achieving wealth and success, so as to feel worthy, and to appear as and be treated as worthy and valuable by others
and, when someone has beauty and yet is not successful and has no money, they are seen as valuable and precious, because of their inherent beauty, and are therefore treated as more than an ugly person without money, simply because beauty = value
so, by virtue of birth, people are born either inherently valuable or inherently valueless, based on the standards of beauty and money
and also, beauty includes the 'beauty' of art and music - so therefore if you have an ugly person with miraculous talent and capability to produce works of 'beauty' for others to experience --- that person is seen as beautiful by virtue of their 'creative talent'
so, if you have someone who is beautiful and an amazingly talented artist, and has money --- they are basically god, worthy of love, adoration and praise
and look at what god represents: creativity, beauty, and abundance - and therefore god is worthy of love, adoration and praise -- which is why life is disregarded by all in favor of the worship of beauty and money
the world is for the most part 'ugly', so naturally people seek that which embodies the idea of beauty --- therefore heaven is such an attractive idea, because it is the embodiment of beauty as defined by the standards and definitions of beauty presented by this world
thus, in existing within such a starting point, taking into consideration life as all as one as equal, is totally illogical and incomprehensible - as the idea and definition of life as defined by beauty and value according to the standards and definitions of the system, can only exist in separation from all as one as equal
therefore culture is truly a cult, where everyone worships beauty and money in their way, and no one sees life, no one sees common sense or self honesty - because to see common sense would mean giving up everything that life in this world is based on - beauty and money
and with sex as the orgasmic experience of ritualistic 'fulfillment' and 'satisfaction' achieved when two beautiful/talented/successfull people come together in an explosion of divine gratification -- communing in the presence of god as beauty and money
and love? we are so warped and delusional that we use the word love based solely on the value and worth we've assigned someone or something according to the standards of beauty/talent/success
and we proclaim that 'love is all there is' and 'love is the solution' -- but if over night all the money went away and everyone turned ugly and the 'beauty' of nature disappeared -- what would there be left to love? we've never loved anything, because we've never loved ourselves, we've never loved life itself - all one and equal -- we've made statements of unconditional love for all in 'oneness' -- but these statements are made from the starting point of 'loving' the 'beauty of life' - not the beingness of life itself as all as one as equal
therefore beauty and love as defined by and of this world, are a total dishonor to life, a total dishonor to self
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the standards of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as having less value than people who embody the standards of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people as ugly or beautiful based on the standards of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the polarity of ugly and beautiful
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people who embody my idea of attractive as having more value than those who do do not
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people who embody my idea of ugly as having less value than those who do not
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be programmed to define quality of life as having money and being attractive according to the standards of beauty and success presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money equals value
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define life according to money and beauty
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to embody the standard of beauty presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to embody and attain to the standards of success presented to me by this world
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money = success = life
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the my idea of beauty is real
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see and realize the separation implied within the idea that beauty and success = value = life - wherein, if one has money one has value
if one has beauty one has value
if one has neither beauty nor money, then one is inherently valueless according to the system's standards and definitions of value
and therefore one without beauty or money is seen as worthless, and therefore bases their entire existence around achieving wealth and success, so as to feel worthy, and to appear as and be treated as worthy and valuable by others
and, when someone has beauty and yet is not successful and has no money, they are seen as valuable and precious, because of their inherent beauty, and are therefore treated as more than an ugly person without money, simply because beauty = value
so, by virtue of birth, people are born either inherently valuable or inherently valueless, based on the standards of beauty and money
and also, beauty includes the 'beauty' of art and music - so therefore if you have an ugly person with miraculous talent and capability to produce works of 'beauty' for others to experience --- that person is seen as beautiful by virtue of their 'creative talent'
so, if you have someone who is beautiful and an amazingly talented artist, and has money --- they are basically god, worthy of love, adoration and praise
and look at what god represents: creativity, beauty, and abundance - and therefore god is worthy of love, adoration and praise -- which is why life is disregarded by all in favor of the worship of beauty and money
the world is for the most part 'ugly', so naturally people seek that which embodies the idea of beauty --- therefore heaven is such an attractive idea, because it is the embodiment of beauty as defined by the standards and definitions of beauty presented by this world
thus, in existing within such a starting point, taking into consideration life as all as one as equal, is totally illogical and incomprehensible - as the idea and definition of life as defined by beauty and value according to the standards and definitions of the system, can only exist in separation from all as one as equal
therefore culture is truly a cult, where everyone worships beauty and money in their way, and no one sees life, no one sees common sense or self honesty - because to see common sense would mean giving up everything that life in this world is based on - beauty and money
and with sex as the orgasmic experience of ritualistic 'fulfillment' and 'satisfaction' achieved when two beautiful/talented/successfull people come together in an explosion of divine gratification -- communing in the presence of god as beauty and money
and love? we are so warped and delusional that we use the word love based solely on the value and worth we've assigned someone or something according to the standards of beauty/talent/success
and we proclaim that 'love is all there is' and 'love is the solution' -- but if over night all the money went away and everyone turned ugly and the 'beauty' of nature disappeared -- what would there be left to love? we've never loved anything, because we've never loved ourselves, we've never loved life itself - all one and equal -- we've made statements of unconditional love for all in 'oneness' -- but these statements are made from the starting point of 'loving' the 'beauty of life' - not the beingness of life itself as all as one as equal
therefore beauty and love as defined by and of this world, are a total dishonor to life, a total dishonor to self
Self Forgiveness Oct 29 2008 - Clothing, appearance, judgments, fitting in, self acceptance
I realized that the reason I still have judgments about the way people look, what they wear, is because when I was young, I never fit in - because I didn't like the same things, have the same interests, behave the same as most others around me - so, in the fifth grade I started to notice that people who were in different groups wore different clothes - and I started to experiment with adopting the styles of others in order to fit in, wanting to be accepted. it was confusing, because I couldn't understand why people would insult and bully each other based on the way they looked/spoke/what they did ---- and I was afraid of these people because I was smaller, and I judged them to have power over me - and yet at the same time I wanted their acceptance so that I could feel powerful as well, and so I wouldn't be hurt or bullied. so as a defense, I started to change my appearance, hoping to blend in with people who I saw as being more safe because they were in groups. I started defining myself based on my clothes, and would frequently shift between styles according to people who seemed to be sure of themselves, and accepted by others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to define myself based on my appearance and clothing
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress myself because I did not fit in
and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like an outsider
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take the words of others personally when they called me weird or stupid because I didn't fit in
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the way I look because others told me I looked weird
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not worthy when others rejected me in school
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am stupid and and not worthy of accepting myself, because others rejected me in school
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to the words of others in taking them personally, instead of realizing that their words reflected who they are, and that I allowed myself to react with hurt and rejection because i didn't stand up and accept me in the moment
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to depend on words of validation of others so that I can feel like I am worthy
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am inferior to those who fit into groups
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am worthless unless I fit into a group, because I allowed myself to take the words of others personally when they bullied me and spoke words of rejection, and then judged myself as worth less than those in groups
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others based on the way they look, because in doing that I feel like I have power over them, because I was able to change my appearance to fit in with others which made me feel like I was worth more than those who didn't fit in - instead of realizing that in that I was allowing myself to do exactly as had been done unto me, because I took the words of others personally and and did not stand up for myself in the moment - I became that which I reacted to
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a good person, and therefore when I have a thought judging another on the way they look, or what they are wearing, I justify the thought, and hide from who I am by constructing the thought in such a way where I project my judgment into a 'third party' within my mind, and assign the judgment to this 'third party', seeing it as the kind of judgment someone else would make about the person I see -- instead of realizing that it is myself that is making the judgment
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define judgments as bad
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as good
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my judgments so that I can remain the good person I define myself as, instead of realizing that my judgments reflect what I allow in me - they are me, therefore I am the one judging
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people as worth more that fit my accepted standards of how one should look
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people as worth less that don't fit my accepted standards of how one should look
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself based on my accepted standards of how I should look
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to others, because in comparing myself I am able to upgrade my standards of how I should look, to ensure that the way I look is accepted by those around me - because I have created standards of how I should look based on others reactions of acceptance/rejection
therefore as long as I stay within my standards of of how I should look, I am safe - because then people will accept me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have standards of how I should look
I forgiv emyself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form standards of how I shoould look based on the words of others of either accepting or rejecting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define safety and security according to and as staying within the safe standards of how I should look - because then I will be accepted and feel good about myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that acceptance has anything to do with another being - instead of realizing that I can only accept myself
I forgiv emyself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself based on clothing
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to memories of not fitting in in school
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define power according to fitting in with others
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define people according to my idea of worth
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to my idea of worth
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to depend on comparison in order to maintain control of myself, because in comparing myself to others, I am able to determine in which ways I am able to manipulate the way I look, so that others can be manipulated into accepting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame school for not supporting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for not accepting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame 'the world' for not supporting me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that everything I have ever felt, has been a result of what I accepted and allowed in me through abdicating myself to the mind
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define support according to the support my parents gave me when I felt bad in school
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I never stood up in school because I suppressed my feeling of powerlessness and inferiority through anger
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use anger to suppress and control the way I feel
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in school, react to accepted and allowed feelings of powerlessness and inferiority with anger
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I have defined my anger as a safe place to be, because when I feel powerless, inferior, not in control, if I get angry then I feel powerful, in control, safe
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define safety according to anger
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to depend on anger so that I can feel in control of myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to need to be in control
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to carry around my past as a burden
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to let go of the past
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my anger as bad, and in that suppress my anger
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to separate myself from my feelings and emotions, instead of accepting them here as me, and directing them here as myself
I am here, I direct me in every moment - no suppression, no judgment, no separation - my feelings are me, my thoughts are me - what I allow me to be - I investigate them and direct them as myself, and remain here in breath
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to define myself based on my appearance and clothing
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress myself because I did not fit in
and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like an outsider
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take the words of others personally when they called me weird or stupid because I didn't fit in
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the way I look because others told me I looked weird
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not worthy when others rejected me in school
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am stupid and and not worthy of accepting myself, because others rejected me in school
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to the words of others in taking them personally, instead of realizing that their words reflected who they are, and that I allowed myself to react with hurt and rejection because i didn't stand up and accept me in the moment
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to depend on words of validation of others so that I can feel like I am worthy
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am inferior to those who fit into groups
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am worthless unless I fit into a group, because I allowed myself to take the words of others personally when they bullied me and spoke words of rejection, and then judged myself as worth less than those in groups
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others based on the way they look, because in doing that I feel like I have power over them, because I was able to change my appearance to fit in with others which made me feel like I was worth more than those who didn't fit in - instead of realizing that in that I was allowing myself to do exactly as had been done unto me, because I took the words of others personally and and did not stand up for myself in the moment - I became that which I reacted to
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a good person, and therefore when I have a thought judging another on the way they look, or what they are wearing, I justify the thought, and hide from who I am by constructing the thought in such a way where I project my judgment into a 'third party' within my mind, and assign the judgment to this 'third party', seeing it as the kind of judgment someone else would make about the person I see -- instead of realizing that it is myself that is making the judgment
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define judgments as bad
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as good
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my judgments so that I can remain the good person I define myself as, instead of realizing that my judgments reflect what I allow in me - they are me, therefore I am the one judging
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people as worth more that fit my accepted standards of how one should look
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people as worth less that don't fit my accepted standards of how one should look
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself based on my accepted standards of how I should look
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to others, because in comparing myself I am able to upgrade my standards of how I should look, to ensure that the way I look is accepted by those around me - because I have created standards of how I should look based on others reactions of acceptance/rejection
therefore as long as I stay within my standards of of how I should look, I am safe - because then people will accept me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have standards of how I should look
I forgiv emyself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form standards of how I shoould look based on the words of others of either accepting or rejecting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define safety and security according to and as staying within the safe standards of how I should look - because then I will be accepted and feel good about myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that acceptance has anything to do with another being - instead of realizing that I can only accept myself
I forgiv emyself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself based on clothing
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to memories of not fitting in in school
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define power according to fitting in with others
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define people according to my idea of worth
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to my idea of worth
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to depend on comparison in order to maintain control of myself, because in comparing myself to others, I am able to determine in which ways I am able to manipulate the way I look, so that others can be manipulated into accepting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame school for not supporting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for not accepting me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame 'the world' for not supporting me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that everything I have ever felt, has been a result of what I accepted and allowed in me through abdicating myself to the mind
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define support according to the support my parents gave me when I felt bad in school
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I never stood up in school because I suppressed my feeling of powerlessness and inferiority through anger
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use anger to suppress and control the way I feel
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in school, react to accepted and allowed feelings of powerlessness and inferiority with anger
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I have defined my anger as a safe place to be, because when I feel powerless, inferior, not in control, if I get angry then I feel powerful, in control, safe
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define safety according to anger
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to depend on anger so that I can feel in control of myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to need to be in control
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to carry around my past as a burden
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to let go of the past
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my anger as bad, and in that suppress my anger
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to separate myself from my feelings and emotions, instead of accepting them here as me, and directing them here as myself
I am here, I direct me in every moment - no suppression, no judgment, no separation - my feelings are me, my thoughts are me - what I allow me to be - I investigate them and direct them as myself, and remain here in breath
Self Forgiveness Oct 18 2008 - Ego, Oneness, Expression
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to speak to people from the starting point of ego
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally realize that other people are myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to participate with people unconditionally and self honestly
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to express me unconditionally
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally realize that other people are myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to participate with people unconditionally and self honestly
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to express me unconditionally
Self Support with Self Forgiveness Oct. 18 2008 - Regret, hope, love
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of wanting another to love me
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of regret
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of wanting others to accept me
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of comparison
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of self judgment
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of fear
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of denial
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of belief
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of expectation
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of wanting to be more
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of inferiority
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of knowledge
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of thoughts
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of hope
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to hope
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally let go of hope
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally support me
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of regret
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of wanting others to accept me
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of comparison
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of self judgment
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of fear
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of denial
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of belief
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of expectation
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of wanting to be more
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of inferiority
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of knowledge
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of thoughts
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of hope
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to hope
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally let go of hope
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally support me
Self Support with Self Forgiveness Oct. 18 2008
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally embrace myself as all as one as equal as myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to take self responsibility for all as myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally embrace myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to love myself unconditionally
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to support myself unconditionally
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to to judge myself
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be enslaved to another being
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally stand up for myself as all as one as equal, here
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe I am inferior to others
I forgive myself myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally accept myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally forgive myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally forgive myself as myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret not standing up for myself unconditionally here, as myself, for myself
I forgive myself that I have not unconditionally allowed myself to realize that I am actually able to forgive myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally let go of the past
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to isolate myself in my mind, believing that I am alone and separate from all others
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for allowing myself to be manipulated by another
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame another for the way I feel
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally realize that I have allowed myself to suffer, through accepting and allowing myself to believe that others have power over me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally trust me
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of wanting others to accept me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally support me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally embrace me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my past for my suffering
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally let go
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally breathe
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally be here
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to take self responsibility for all as myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally embrace myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to love myself unconditionally
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to support myself unconditionally
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to to judge myself
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be enslaved to another being
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally stand up for myself as all as one as equal, here
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe I am inferior to others
I forgive myself myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally accept myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally forgive myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally forgive myself as myself
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret not standing up for myself unconditionally here, as myself, for myself
I forgive myself that I have not unconditionally allowed myself to realize that I am actually able to forgive myself
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally let go of the past
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to isolate myself in my mind, believing that I am alone and separate from all others
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for allowing myself to be manipulated by another
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame another for the way I feel
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally realize that I have allowed myself to suffer, through accepting and allowing myself to believe that others have power over me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally trust me
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to do forgiveness from the starting point of wanting others to accept me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally support me
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally embrace me
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my past for my suffering
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally let go
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally breathe
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to unconditionally be here
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Blame is an Act of Personality
blame is simply a function of personality
though we are responsible for allowing starvation - 'self blame' as an act of self judgment or guilt or regret is irrelevant and useless
we can blame ourselves but it is simply emotional sentiment
that's why we take responsibility for what we are aware of and direct it according to how we see we can make a change
when someone blames another for 'making them feel bad' for instance - blame is simply act of defending ones own personality and trying to control another's personality to 'right the wrong' that they perceive has been 'done unto them'
blame exists where something is not being directed within taking self responsibility
if someone breaks into your house and murders your children - it is useless to blame the murderer - the blame is an act of personality, an act of emotion
blaming the murderer does not stop murder or breaking and entering
if we were self honest we would see murder and abuse is allowed every day - we support a system of murder and abuse
when we stand up and begin to direct our lives within no more accepting and allowing a system of murder and abuse - when we act as the principle of what is best for all within Equality and support a solution that is best for all which will not allow murder and abuse - when we place ourselves in the world as a point that assists and supports others to see the principle of how abuse and murder has come to exist - we are assisting and supporting all beings as ourselves to eventually realize the same principle and inevitably all beings will stop harming each other as all beings will have realized that in directing this world as ourselves within what is best for all - we ensure that no harm will come to us ourselves, or another as ourselves
blame is a futile act of personality that only supports people to remain within inequality and abuse through remaining within personality as separation
though we are responsible for allowing starvation - 'self blame' as an act of self judgment or guilt or regret is irrelevant and useless
we can blame ourselves but it is simply emotional sentiment
that's why we take responsibility for what we are aware of and direct it according to how we see we can make a change
when someone blames another for 'making them feel bad' for instance - blame is simply act of defending ones own personality and trying to control another's personality to 'right the wrong' that they perceive has been 'done unto them'
blame exists where something is not being directed within taking self responsibility
if someone breaks into your house and murders your children - it is useless to blame the murderer - the blame is an act of personality, an act of emotion
blaming the murderer does not stop murder or breaking and entering
if we were self honest we would see murder and abuse is allowed every day - we support a system of murder and abuse
when we stand up and begin to direct our lives within no more accepting and allowing a system of murder and abuse - when we act as the principle of what is best for all within Equality and support a solution that is best for all which will not allow murder and abuse - when we place ourselves in the world as a point that assists and supports others to see the principle of how abuse and murder has come to exist - we are assisting and supporting all beings as ourselves to eventually realize the same principle and inevitably all beings will stop harming each other as all beings will have realized that in directing this world as ourselves within what is best for all - we ensure that no harm will come to us ourselves, or another as ourselves
blame is a futile act of personality that only supports people to remain within inequality and abuse through remaining within personality as separation
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